The Wind in My Hair
The wind slaps my face, my feet pound, my heart races, I can feel the sweat pooling between the skin of my back and the shirt I’m wearing. It’s early, the sun just beginning its arc across the sky and the beach is almost empty except for a few nature lovers getting their beach fix for the day.
I love this time, this early morning liminal time before life picks up speed, commerce gets busy, and the expectations start. It’s the same pleasure I used to get staying up late, like sneaking something, being up when you know any decent person would be asleep. I love to jog. And I hope I can convince you to love it too.
I didn’t always love jogging. Once, when I was in my teens, my dad decided to take my brother and I out for a run. My father was recently retired military, and throughout his years in the Army, running was a regular part of their physical training. Afterwards, he continued to run for reasons I nor my brother could understand. We lived in Reston, Virginia, a suburb of Washington D.C., that in the summers was so hot, your sweat became viscous in the baking sun, going from a liquid to a cream that was like fat being cooked out in a frying pan. It was on one of these days that my father decided to introduce us to the joys of running, taking us to Washington and Old Dominion Trail near our home. All I wanted to do was to sprawl in my bedroom listening to The Cure and reading a book. I was not a kid who was into sports or did anything active. I was on the slim side, but I was not fit. My dad tried to get us excited, by encouraging us to race each other, but the experiment was a bust. My brother and I both moped around, hot, and frustrated. My dad finished his run and we went home. Thank god.
Cut to years later, when I try to jog at least once a week. No stress, I don’t try to impress anyone with my speed (okay, maybe sometimes, see below). I have no plans, (yet) to run marathons. I just love the feeling, the power that comes from knowing I can take myself anywhere with just what God gave me. I don’t need to sign up, I don’t need to wait for anyone, I don’t need a gym membership, I don’t need fancy workout gear. I can get from here to where I want to to go on the power of my body and my heart. Sometimes I run for a few moments, just to see how fast I can go, to impress some unsuspecting squirrels with my swiftness. Sometimes I walk for long stretches, before breaking into a light jog. Sometimes I jog, slow and steady, going and going, breath easy, feeling my own endurance, riding it, but not to the breaking point. When I jog, when I’m moving my body, I’m reminded of how capable I actually am. I can go anywhere. I can. Go. Anywhere.
Like many women of color, running, jogging, walking have been an important part of my personal stress reduction and physical fitness program. Some describe having flow state experiences, the sweet spot when you lose sense of the limited Self and become the energy of the run, fully immersed in the experience. I’ve had some of those experiences, not every jog or run, but enough of them to keep me at it. The state of mind in which the ego stops chattering away and just fully enjoys the moment of effortless movement. Let me tell you, it’s perhaps the best high there is, elemental, natural and healthy.
Some days I run because I feel exhausted. Those are the hardest times to get going, and I usually just start by walking. Once I’m walking I find I start to get enticed by the prospect of jogging a bit to shake off the mental cobwebs. Sometimes I run because I feel sad. Like many other people, I too coped with personal loss and challenges over the last year. After my grandmother died with Covid, I would sometimes jog along the beach, letting myself cry, letting my body just move with the pain. Sometimes I run when I’m excited, when like a kid, I can’t wait to get out there, to smell the flowers, see the water, the trees, the sky, when I just feel a part of nature. Every time I run or jog, I feel proud of myself, I feel good, I feel a part of things out there. And all of those feelings are great for bringing down stress and anxiety.
So I hope you consider getting out there. Whatever legs you have, whatever way you have of getting around, I wish you the joy of feeling You moving yourself. You can go anywhere.
Brief Bio:
Maedean Yvonne Myers is a Registered Clinical Counsellor in private practice. Her practice , Evolving Story Counselling and Consulting is located in Kitsilano, BC on the traditional territories of the Coast Salish Peoples. In addition to her work as a therapist, she recently completed her 200 Hour Yoga Teacher Training. She enjoys jogging, karate, and will be studying for her Eco-Therapy Certificate in the fall. Her work is about supporting humans affirm their uniqueness, love more deeply, and live more purposefully.